I hate being disappointed. I don't like getting my hopes up just so it can be tared down. So, I created this place and idea that allowed me to not get hurt. I call it being "realistic," others call it negativity. I don’t always think positive thoughts. After a tough situation, my first thought is not always a quoted scripture or proverb like "everything happens for a reason" or "that all things work for the good of those who love the Lord". Instead, sometimes I wonder, “why me?” Sometimes, I get angry; sometimes, I want to scream. At times, there is not a positive bone in my body. I believe a majority of the time I can be extremely pessimistic before I choose to show any type of optimism. I usually think and revert to the WORST case scenario and even when I realize that I’m over-reacting, I still manage to do the same thing all over again. I want to be a good christian woman who is always blissful but the truth is I don't always think positive.
Here is the reality as a christian woman I'm not suppose to be a negative Nancy. I am suppose to think things that are pure, noble, and true. Therefore sometimes I act like my situation will get better. I act like I'm happy with an out come and I smile even when my thoughts are frowning. I no longer want to keep acting.
But the truth is sometimes, my thoughts are a snare unto the Lord. I can write this amazing testimony and then go right back to thinking the way I did. I don’t always think I’m good enough or qualified. There are times when I want to angrily go off on someone. There are times when I ignore God. There are even times in which the Holy Spirit will reassure something, but I second-guess it and constantly over-analyze the situation. Sometimes, I judge myself and others. All of this happens -not all at once, but I have my moments. So how can the positivity of the word of God be living in me, along with my negative thoughts?
I want you to know that joy and positivity doesn't come easy especially if you have been hurt in the past. Unless you have that gift, we ALL go through the fight of finding positivity. What I usually tell people is, “there is no way to draw closer to God and not begin to change.” Even though I could be really pessimistic, the closer and closer I get to God, the more I begin to change. Sometimes change can take place without you even realizing it.
Therefore, here are two things I want you to take from this:
#1 I’m born again, but I’m still alive.
When we are reborn, the idea is that our previous self has died and has left old things behind. That's why we get baptized; it symbolizes dying to self and rising as a new creature in the Lord. We are now living in hope. Our hope is faith and belief that Christ died for us and now we can walk in authority into the process of change.
But then if we read Romans 7:15 -17, Paul goes into detail about his struggle with trying to do the right thing and reverting back to old habits. In verse 17, he states,
“As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me.”
He is willing to do better, but his nature would rather do what it feels. His nature is still a part of him. Therefore, we can learn to think better and do better, but our first instinct is to do what we use to, even if it is a bad habit. Therefore, know it will take time. So don't beat yourself up because although we are born again, we are still alive and residing in a sinful body. So don't beat yourself up keep taking steps that will help you think more posittive. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. So next time you are about to think negatively challenge your thoughts with a positive one even if that isn't "realistic" to you, remember it's a challenge.
#2 As a man think, so is he.
I’m sure you’ve heard people say, “if you put positivity out in the world, you will receive it back from the universe.” Yeah, well the word God said it first in
Proverbs 23:7 -"as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."
This was stated in the sense that we are a summation of our thoughts. God doesn’t want us thinking anything contrary of Him. Therefore, if you think negative thoughts, you become negative; likewise, if you think positive thoughts, you are positive. In Philippians 4:6-9, the verses speak on prayer requests and positive thinking.
Vs 6. Pray about everything and make it known to God.
Vs.7 The peace of God will transcend your understanding and guard your heart
Vs.8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.
V. 9 Put it in practice and God will be with you.
There you have it -I don’t always think positive thoughts, but the word of God tells me I can. It teaches me how and explains why it is important. The reason why Christians get the reputation for being over-joyed, cheerful, and zealous is because we have realized Christ always gives us a way out of everything. As a result, you are never truly bound to anything.