The Engagement Before the Marriage Part 2

Updated: Apr 27, 2019



Part 2 "Show me your ring"

I remember how it sparkled. I remember how the light caught it’s glimmer every time I moved my hand from side to side to get a glimpse of the symbol that made my proposal complete.This is what sealed the deal towards getting married. I was enamored -not only by what represented my fiance’s commitment, but also by his ability to humble himself enough to get onto his knees just to show how committed he was. My heart was immediately overjoyed and filled with love. In that moment, there was a glow within me that shined so bright. It was undeniable; everyone around me could see it. There was a sparkle in my eye that transcended in my ring. That night, I felt special and from then on, I couldn’t wait to spend the rest of my life with my best friend. We were official, and I had the ring to prove it.


Since the commitment, I’ve been realizing how much my relationship with Barry reminds me of my baptism. Our relationship is a constant compare and contrast with my relationship with God. After all, God’s relationship was here first, so there are constant reminders and lessons that I’ve learned from it that I use in my other relationships. It’s important to me that I continue sharing these discoveries as I learn more about who I am within both. My engagement was important because it showed my choice to be loyal and devoted to one person. But what happens after the making of that commitment?

That night, I stared at my ring for a long while, waiting for the magic. I had waited for this special day for my whole life. I wanted to feel the difference; I wondered if I was even different. I remember I had the same feeling after being baptized. Because my baptism was fresh on my mind, I believed instantaneous change would happen. I assumed the thought alone would remind me not to do things that were considered immoral. But I realized the real challenge lay ahead. It would soon be time for me to showcase my spiritual ring. But what is your ring as it relates to baptism? And how do you wear this spiritual ring out in public?


As a woman, you can’t conceal your engagement. Everyone can see your ring a mile away, and are ready to admire it. When I got baptized, however, I had no ring or sign to grab people’s attention and let them know of my commitment to God. I wanted to show that I was different. But how? Some may think that comes from how long you wear your skirt or how many times you go to church. Others may believe it’s your ability to quote scripture. It is more than all of that. Though those stem from personal conviction, God wants to see our inner fruits. He is the only person who is able to see our emotional heart and what originates from it. Before Barry became my fiance, he was my friend. During that season, I came to find we had a lot in common. I began to see myself picking up his silly habits and tendencies. This was because of the developing relationship we now shared. When you continuously relate to and with someone, you will begin to see their ability to influence you. If that is true between you and God, He should have the ability to influence you as well.


“I have this theory!” I told my sister one day, “I believe if a couple looks alike, they are meant to be.” I know it might sound ridiculous, but think about it. Have you ever known two good friends your entire life, who finally decide to date? Throughout their relationship, you know there wasn’t a real change to their physical features, but didn’t they begin to seem alike to you? You start to notice that they act the same, talk the same, and liked the same things. They began to take on one another’s attributes and thus look just alike. Remember when God made Adam? At the time, there were none like him. There were only animals. But out of Adam, God formed someone who was just like him -not in physical features, but in essence. When showing your spiritual ring off, the way you speak or act will automatically show everyone that you are different, because you will begin to take the shape of Christ.


The other day, I had to take my ring to the jeweler because I was careless and lost one of its diamonds. Because of this, I have not worn my ring for weeks, which has led people to ask, “Where is your ring?” After I got baptized, I went straight to college. I didn’t have anyone to ask me if I was wearing my spiritual ring or not. I was the only one around to hold myself accountable for the act of baptism, that at the time only I knew of. It wasn’t easy to show it off, because I feared the judgement of being different, or looking foreign. I didn’t always look like God because there were times I was embarrassed to claim my association with Him. This put a blockade in God’s ability to influence me. However, As my relationship with God began to grow. I began to show my spiritual ring more through compassion, love, submission, sacrifice, and true conviction to not do things that others around me did. It wasn't easy but through the help of the Holy Spirit my ring was beginning to shine. At this moment, all my friends and family know that I’m engaged to be married, so they hold me accountable for not having my symbol on. You want to have people like that in your life -people who know you well enough to ask you, “Why did you stop wearing your spiritual ring? You seem different, what is going on?” This then can remind you of your commitment you made. Does God shine bright in you? If so, be excited to show your ring off, You won’t need to say anything. Because people will see God in you a mile away. Shine bright.

I pray this blog gives you insight into a relationship with God that I hope you begin to have. I pray it inspires you and opens your mind to show your spiritual ring, and to be ok with looking and acting like Christ, while showcasing that for all to see. God Bless!

The Engagement before the marriage Part 1

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