Doctors Said She Couldn’t Get Pregnant: Sandra Elidor’s Journey Through IVF, Endometriosis, and Infertility

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My name is Sandra Elidor, and this is my testimony.

Even though I wasn't allowed to date at the time, my husband and I were high school sweethearts. Ironically enough, my parents only became aware of this later, after we married. After high school my husband joined the military, and I went to college.

Our lives became completely independent from one another, and we were so far removed, each in different relationships.

Later in life we reconnected when I began looking into purchasing a vehicle at the dealership where he worked. That moment etched thoughts and emotions toward him back into my mind. Undeniably, our romance rekindled and we got married.

The Desire to Grow Our Family

We were now a family of three, as I inherited his beautiful daughter as a bonus baby. Soon, the idea of growing my family became a strong desire, and I was honestly hopeful about getting pregnant during our honeymoon.

Because we were eager, we went to the doctor to get checked. Months went by, and then a year passed with no signs of pregnancy. My doctor then prescribed a medication called Clomid to help stimulate ovulation.

The Hidden Struggle With Endometriosis

While trying to conceive, it’s important to note that I always struggled with horrible, excruciating periods. Growing up, I went to the ER multiple times for this pain, never knowing what the cause was. It was later revealed that I had endometriosis. While on the medication, I began experiencing unusual and severe pain to the point where I was unable to walk.

After two months, an ultrasound showed a cyst on both ovaries. After a month off the medication, one cyst reduced in size while the one on the right side grew. I was then scheduled for exploratory surgery for removal.

Being Told I Could Not Get Pregnant Naturally

During my follow-up post-operation appointment, my doctor explained that my right fallopian tube had been removed. The left tube was also concerning because it was blocked and not fully functioning, which could lead to an ectopic pregnancy. My body needed time to heal before trying again to get pregnant.

Later, I was sent to do a test called a hysterosalpingogram (HSG) — a test where dye is placed into the uterus to check for blockages or abnormalities.

That day the doctor told me, “Sorry, but you can't get pregnant on your own and will need assistance like IVF.”

Wrestling With Faith and the Decision to Pursue IVF

In that moment I broke down in devastation. I had always wanted children. I babysat often and was always surrounded by kids. To hear this made it feel impossible.

I knew nothing about IVF and didn't want to play God.

I was worried. What if I did this out of God’s will and later had to deal with the repercussions? What if God said to me, “I never sent you”?

Thankfully, my pastor shed light on this and helped me realize that God can use doctors and medical facilities to create possibilities and still receive the glory from it. Even so, I wondered many times, Why was this my story?

At one point, I even sat down and wrote all of my sins to try to understand what I had done to not be able to bear a child. My husband asked me why I was reopening things that God had already forgiven me for. Soon after, I ended that exercise.

When God Spoke to Me

Instead, I began researching IVF and endometriosis. I told myself that I would only focus on what I could control in hopes that it would yield success. So I changed my diet and began doing things I believed would be beneficial for my body.

Then one day at work, I heard something for the first time ever audibly from God:

“You're doing everything else and don't know if you'll get this child, and I'm right here."

In that moment, I had to run to a secluded place to worship God. I realized that I had put more energy into my fertility journey than into seeking God.

I decided to make a change. I started reading my Word and spending personal quiet time with God. My husband and I both began to change.

Trusting God Even When We Had No Money for IVF

Then we made a huge decision to catapult our IVF journey forward. We packed our belongings and moved in with my parents. This was a very uncomfortable time in our lives both financially and emotionally. Without knowing how we would pay for IVF, we still moved forward with our appointments.

The doctor scheduled us to make a payment on Friday and begin the procedure on Monday. We had no money for this, but surprisingly we didn’t stress. I was working at Nova Southeastern University (NSU) and my husband had just started the police academy. We had only been living at my parents’ house for three months, so we hadn’t saved anything yet.

However, by God’s grace, a check came in the mail from a settlement related to a car accident my husband had experienced. That check covered the procedure.

We also received money from our Haitian esòl, a rotational savings club, which helped cover the medication that we were able to purchase at a great rate through our trusted pharmacist friend.

God was putting the pieces together before our very eyes.

The IVF Miracle: Becoming Pregnant

So many people at our church were praying for us.

On the day of implantation, we started with six eggs, but only two were viable. After some time and symptoms, it was confirmed that I was finally pregnant. We were so excited.

We were then referred to a perinatal doctor who told us that our baby had excess fluid in the back of his head, which could lead to a learning disability. We were asked if we wanted to terminate the pregnancy, and we said no. We were willing to walk whatever road that meant.

This pregnancy was not easy. I spent many days in and out of the hospital because I was bleeding often. By the second trimester, I was told I had placenta previa, a condition where the placenta covers the cervix and causes bright red, painless bleeding. I was told that I would need a C-section.

An Emergency Delivery at 29 Weeks

At 23 weeks pregnant, I experienced the worst bleeding yet. I was trailing blood everywhere and was sure I was having a miscarriage. When I arrived at the hospital, I was told I would have to be admitted. I stayed there for about a month and a half, bleeding and barely allowed to walk.

One day I advocated for the chance to walk a little around the unit. When I returned, I blacked out and woke up to a team of people surrounding me.

At 29 weeks, I went into preterm labor. I had to undergo an emergency C-section while in severe pain.

Though it was horrific, our beautiful baby boy was born weighing 3 pounds 9 ounces. He stayed in the hospital for about a month and a half. Later he completed the necessary physical therapy, and today I have a healthy 12-year-old boy.

When God Shows That the Impossible Is Possible

Everything could have gone wrong, and at times it seemed like it would. But God’s grace made it right.

Later, when we wanted to try again, we were told it wouldn’t happen. However, I got pregnant again naturally for the first time ever. Even though that pregnancy ended in miscarriage, it still showed me something important: God wanted me to understand His infinite power and wisdom.

What others say is impossible, He can make possible.

How My Infertility Journey Inspired: Filling Empty Wombs

The advice I would give to someone going through a similar situation is this: you may not know the reason why you're going through it right now, but the answer will reveal itself in time. Until then, find your tribe — people who will support you during the times of struggle and uncertainty.

Now I know why I went through this.

I experienced pain, confusion, loss, and the feeling of being lost and empty. I became tired of constantly crying.

From that pain, my nonprofit was born: Filling Empty Wombs.

My organization helps women find support and assistance while navigating infertility, giving them a space to know that they are not alone.

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